Blowing up my inbox: Coachella

Oh, THANK YOU RonRobinson!
I really didn't know how I was going to survive Coachella this year.
Luckily, you have $400 hair spritzer. Phew. Sigh of relief.

I seriously wish I had something to sell to the gazillions of people who bought the chicest everything (read: backpacks, fannypacks, jewelry, sunnies, high-waisted shorts, more jewelry, flowy dresses, floppy hats, forms of lingerie that you wear as clothing unironically... you get the point) to attend, or... maybe not attend... Coachella.

Alas, I can't sell June Lake's hospitality to folks bound for the desert.

As an avid online shopper, my inbox is filled - which, technically is pretty hard to do with gmail - with sales pitches. As a marketing maven, I particularly enjoy watching events become a new marketing platform.

Which, Coachella has done.

Why?

Because celebs walk around looking like they just "woke up looking like this" in festival wear and sleepy, hung over eyes that somehow makes you jealous, instead of super happy you decided to forego the tequila binge last night.

With Coachella yet to begin until tomorrow, check out the 2014 hashers on Instagram.

Which is why, I stress again, if you have anything you want to sell to a group of wealthy, poser hippie/festival goers, well, you're probably too late for 2014. Unless Kate Bosworth decides to wear something of yours tomorrow. Then you're #setforlife. Because Kate's body might as well be a billboard. Paid space.

A 2011 Kate fave. 

Next life goal: becoming famous enough so that my body can be a billboard for really really really expensive pieces. Please, if there is a god.

But seriously. Can normal people GO to Coachella? Do they let you in the gates if you wear a plaid polo? I personally would just celebrity watch, but still try to appear, like, totally cool and really into the music.

Because in the end, it's all about the music.